Sunday, 19 January 2014

CAN YOU FIND A REASON TO SHOW COMPASSION?


As you wake up every morning, you decide how your day is going to be, do you want it to be good and enjoyable or do you allow your perception of the day’s events to dictate your state of mind. You are going to face the day with a close and defeated mind or an open and grateful one. At any given time of each day, negative and positive things will happen to you and, your perception of these events will be the determining factor of how your day will unfold. You will meet many people who will behave differently towards you depending on their state of mind; your response to these circumstances will shape your day. Can you show compassion to someone who has done you wrong? Can you disregard the injustice befalling you to understand the real reason behind the attitude of the supposed offender?

 

Every time you feel that an injustice has been done to you, your first reaction is to become angry and, possibly retaliate to satisfy your desire for revenge. No one wants to feel hard done by others, everybody deserves justice, good treatment and a comfortable sense of wellbeing. You need to be in a good place mentally and physically to withstand the rigor and setbacks in life. You cannot walk around with a negative mind set, full of resentment and expect things to go your way. Even though you cannot stop some difficult circumstances from happening to you, you still have the ability to choose how you react to those events. If you choose to see them has part of your journey in becoming what you want it to be, you will be in a better position to accept them for what they are and, deal with them.

 

You might be able to tell from the way someone is behaving that they are in distress, but you will not know the extent of their problem unless they tell you what they are going through. People are generally quick to judge others through their actions, you will not know their motivation for acting the way they did until they decide to tell you.

You have to learn to be compassionate towards others, especially when they don’t behave the way you expect them to. Happy people don’t go around hurting or abusing others, because they are so preoccupied with sharing their joy and happiness. The next time a person behaves contrary to your expectation, instead of allowing yourself to be overcome with anger, stop and think about the reason for the strange behaviour. When you choose to be more understanding towards others, your attitude gives you the freedom to react the way you want, rather than being a prisoner to your emotions.

 

A man we would call Jim was sitting on a train coming back from a day work during the weekend, during his journey another man boarded the train with three young children. The children were quite rowdy and restless and contrary to Jim and other passenger’s expectations, the man who was supposed to be the father did not seem to care about the disruptive behaviour of his children. Outraged by the attitude of the children’s father Jim called him out to ask if he was the father, he responded affirmatively and he continued to ask if he could get his children to make less noise. The father promptly apologised to Jim and, explained that the children were still in shock as they lost their mum just two hours earlier.

 

 In a matter of seconds, Jim and other around went from being outraged to being compassionate. It is not the nature of the event that changed their attitude but their perception of what happened. If you learn to show more compassion towards others, if you choose carefully your reaction to circumstances and events happening to you every day, you will begin to gain freedom from your emotion. You will be able to make decision based on fact not only about how you feel. Your feeling about your circumstances might not reflect the truth and, by allowing your emotion to dictate your response you give away power. Be more compassionate towards others, make an effort to understand why they are acting out of character and whenever possible choose to react with more compassion.

 

CHRISTIAN  

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